If Emilio Bonifacio Were on Facebook, Our Relationship Status Would Say “It’s Complicated”
ByHate takes a lot of energy, especially when it’s genuine. It’s powerful that way. That’s why when you truly detest something – like, say, Ben Affleck movies, for instance – it’s almost impossible to break free of that seething hatred and see things from the other perspective.
This is how I’ve felt about Emilio Bonifacio since his arrival in Florida in 2009, but with a bunt single in the 5th inning Tuesday night, the bane of my existence stretched his hitting streak to 18 games and, for the first time in three years, forced me to step back and reconsider my deep-rooted hatred.
Once upon a time, Speedy Mc[BLEEP]face was the poster child for futility. A ground ball here, a called third strike there, mix in the occasional failed bunt and you’ve got yourself the recipe for a day at the park with Emilio Bonifacio. Something changed this year, though. At the beginning of the season, I chalked it up to a small sample size. After all, Hanley was batting, like, .143, so anything was possible. But, here we are, 97 games into a 162 game season and Bonifacio has the highest BA (.290) and OBP (.364) of any Marlins regular. And he can bunt! Extended statistical fluke? It’s possible, but we’re certainly beyond that small sample size argument. Which kind of scares me.
As I said earlier, nobody likes to reassess hatred. I’ve spent too many blogging hours and an unreasonable amount of tweets sculpting my feelings into a beautiful statue for me to decide to break it down now and start from scratch because I just noticed an unsightly edge or two.
Dan Le Batard has stated multiple times on his radio show that he believes Hanley Ramirez‘s numbers will be better than Bonifacio’s when the season finally comes to an end, that basically, the world will right itself, because when it comes to statistics, it always does. I’m not sure I’m 100% on board with that sentiment – Hanley’s slump lasted way too long and I’m not entirely convinced his recent success isn’t just a little bit of the opposite extreme – but I do agree with the premise.
I don’t believe, not even for a second, that this is the Emilio Bonifacio we should expect to see going forward. I can’t believe it. I won’t. These last 293 at-bats aren’t going to erase the memory of the previous 833. But, I’m willing to call a truce. Sure, the hatred is still there, it’s just buried a little deeper right now. And I’m sure it’ll resurface the moment he strikes out three times and bunts a pop-up back to the pitcher.
For now, though, Emilio and I are cool. No hard feelings, bro. Just try not to suck again, okay? I can only suppress this rage-filled hate for so long.

